Elkhorn Antiques Market 06/24/2012

Last weekend I hit the Elkhorn Antiques Market with some folks, and despite bowing out early (so. hot. and. sunny), I found some awesome oddities and wonders to share. Elkhorn is an incredible market. There's a really diverse group of sellers/wares and an amazing number of them. I've always gotten there when the gate opens at 7 a.m. and have NEVER managed to see everything before closing.

 Can’t afford the boat to go with her. I likely can’t even afford her. Still nifty.

  Awesome medical exam/tattoo parlour chair.

 Gorgeous bronze sign, but quite pricy at $350

 

It Ain't Me Babe was a one-shot underground comic published in 1970; it was the first-known comic produced entirely by women. I would have loved to have snagged this, but at $40, my budget couldn't justify it.

 Horrifyingly racist naked “native” chalkware doll from the 1920s

 Quack medicine violet ray set from 1928 in very good condition and complete. It even comes with the original catalog of optional attachments.

 A couple of more quackeries:  Arsenic Complexion Wafers and Gonosan.

 I didn’t realize that they had formally organized. Good for you, ladies!

 Even more quackery! An original oil lamp for the use of Vapo-Cresoline with original packaging.

 (Warning: Obligatory Big Lebowski reference ahead)  

The rug really tied the lawn together

 This is one of those toys that I have very vague memories of from my childhood (Since it's from 1966, maybe an older sibling of a friend had this?). Glad to know that my imagination/nightmares did not create this and the product actually existed. It’s like Sid and Marty Krofft decided to tap into the popularity of the E Z Bake Oven.

 Silver Eucharist set

 I imagine that this is what a GM would wake up to if one decided to open up a D & D group to La Cosa Nostra.

 ---OR--- 

I see that St. George was here...

 Most. Depressing. Stuffy. EVAH.

 An absolutely incredible hand carved rosewood mantelpiece. I wish I could have gotten a better shot of it.

 Evidence that children were not always bubble wrapped and helmeted for their protection: This kiddie “roller coaster”. Essentially, the child would climb on board the wagon car at the top of the “hill” then launch themselves down the rails and onward (hopefully not into traffic). Whee! Definitely from the Erwin Mainway School of child development.

 Nothing sets the mood better than the soft glow from a desiccated puffer fish with a lightbulb inside (What SORT of mood, I’m afraid to ask…)

 Just what every child needs…a robot bartender with rolling eyes! (Note: Box definitely states that this IS intended as a toy. Clearly another Mainway product.) Want to see him in action? There's a video on YouTube.

 Box of vintage blowtorches

 Box of vintage medical tools (I’m noticing a trend)

 I’m just including this because I want it ever so much. This would make such a gorgeous work table/desk. It even has a glass top to protect the wood. Only $275 too. *sigh*

 For when you don’t want to drag that big and clunky Professor McClarity’s Miracle Pneumatic Suction Hygienic Device out to clean the carpets… a not-quite-steampunk-but-still-cool antique sweeper.

 Now I just need the house for this chandelier.

What’s a trip to the antiques market without at least one disturbing clown figure? This one looks melty and he's transparent, so you can see the souls he's consumed.

Not antique. Not even really vintage. (Kinda icky, actually). Give it a few years and perhaps you can say something along the lines of “In the 1990s, Midwestern couples were emboldened by viewings of HBO's Real Sex and thus purchased salacious and absurd marital novelties” and hipsters of the 2030s will find it kitschy.

 Secure those bungs! (Unrelated to the previous photo, incidentally).

 As long as we're already in the gutter...adhesive joke beer can label, circa 1970s.

 One more bit of smuttery, “Tijuana bibles”

 Circa 1920s phrenology book

 Very early 20^th century dental chart produced by Lavoris (per the company's website, they claim that they originally coined the term "halitosis")

Miller Park Flea Market 6/17/2012

This is the first year for the Miller Park Flea Market, so it is still rather small (less than 100 vendors), but I figured it would be worth checking out. Highlights and oddities included:

We parked in the Rollie Fingers section, and let me tell you, I was disappointed. The banner really doesn't do his twirly 1890s Gilded Age/porn 'stache justice. If you're going to do a tribute...do it right, man.

 One of the vendors had this nifty ammeter. The seller tried to convince us that it was a quack medicine tool to justify the $80 tag but...yeah...not so much. I know quackery and this isn't it. It's an ammeter. There is an identical one on eBay right now for $170 (including shipping), so the price wasn't out of line...just her description.

Affirmations for the hipster with low-self esteem.  At least your beer will always love you...

 (I should mention that this is in Milwaukee, where PBR is neither hip nor ironic, but rather, what one drinks on the cheap at the VFW Hall. Because it is cheap. And it is beer.)

Spoon sword! (as modeled by my partner). Nothing is so intimidating as a longhaired dude standing in front of a dumpster wielding a two-foot long brass weapon of such absurdity. Nothing!

A copy of a hoax. How meta!

In a Mason jar. Just like grandma used to make.

 

This just looks like a serial killer's trophy. In fact, I'm pretty sure that if Jodie Foster had kept poking around that storage unit in Silence of The Lambs, she would have found this. 

I think the vendor would have better luck moving that bit on the right if he tried to sell it as a Game of Thrones Lawn Ornament. It's all in the marketing.

 

I am entirely too thrilled with myself for having snagged a tattoo flash patterned purse for just $5.  (In the background, you may notice TV's Oscar from The Office and a woman rocking some seriously feathered hair.)

Why is the artisan-made cheese so special here in Wisconsin? Well...let me tell you...

(No, this is not from the market, but it is a real sign. It's nailed to the front of the feed and grain store in the next town over. From what I've found, this was a livestock feed product circa 1914 or so.)

Kane County Antiques Market 6/3/2012

Sharing some nifty finds from last weekend's market foray. I may be making posts like this throughout the summer as the outdoor markets are in high gear.

I wish the picture had come out better, but the glare from the glass was an issue. It’s a memorial diorama for a little girl that died in 1895. It’s rather sad that it ended up at a flea market and I wonder about the path that led it here. I talked to the dealer (who, if you’re interested, I can send you contact info for. She’s tagged $75) for a while about Victorian memorial pieces like hair jewelry, death portraits, mourning brooches, and the like. While I’m fascinated by cabinet card death portraits, I’m a bit twitchy about using those images. I don’t know why, but it feels like an uncomfortable intimacy and violation of the sacred. I also have weird quirks about rosary beads. I occasionally find broken strands that…if the beads were on a piece of jewelry…I’d repurpose them in a heartbeat. On a rosary…no.

This isn't a much better picture, but I wanted to try to get a bit of the detail.

 Always sound advice!

 Haven't you always wanted your own psychiatrist's couch? This was in fairly good shape and circa 1960s. The vendor had it marked $150, but was willing to let me have it for $75 if I took it with me this past Sunday. There is no way that I could do it though and absolutely no room in my apartment. I took her name and number, just in case anyone local does have the means of transport/space for this.

I’m just glad this little one is behind glass. He seems to be...plotting.

  (Our National Calamity of Fire, Flood, and Tornado: Thrilling Stories With Photographs and Sketches)
This was on a table of mostly vintage children’s books. The perfect gift for the kid who found Old Yeller to be too upbeat.

I started to dig through this box to find a companion for my male doll (the one in Eastern Orthodox vestments), but Matt stopped me. Apparently, he feels that one disturbing celluloid doll is enough for our domicile.

 (The aforementioned gentleman. He came from the April market at Kane County)
I’m not sure why I own him other than the fact that he somehow reminded me of my childhood and the dusty dolls that I’d see in the Eastern European-American shops in the Detroit neighborhood of Delray (I’m of Hungarian descent). He now lives with me, much to my boyfriend’s dismay. I wore him in my cleavage when I went out to dinner with friends after the market and I was highly disappointed that nobody commented on my tag along friend. Then again, if a little priestly head was popping out of someone’s blouse, wouldn’t you politely ignore it?

I really wanted this, but I’d already bought one antique poison/pharmacy bottle for the day and I was practicing restraint. I should have gotten it for $15.

The Sanitary Nipple Drinker by Porkmaster! (Sometimes I have the brain of a twelve year old boy. I keep it in a jar...wanna see?)

 This vendor had a few of these, but this is the only one that had a hand. (Yes..those are models of human fetal development in cutaway uteri in the background. Alas, I don't have a better picture of them.)

This was from the same dealer that had all of the prosthetic arms.

Love this Catrina. LOVE. HER. She’s about 9 feet tall and made of salvaged sheet metal. If I could have her come live on my apartment patio, I would (during warm months, of course. She’d reside in my living room in the colder months. I have no skeletons in my closet…she’s next to the sofa, perplexing the cats). This dealer had all sorts of gorgeous Calaveras and other Mexican art, including Catholic icons.

 What goes better with a smooth mild smoke than a female Terminator?

Marlene and Darlene had a lovely time at the dance and are now doing the Sunday morning walk of shame.

I am doll eyes
Doll mouth, doll legs
I am doll arms, big veins, dog bait
Yeah, they really want you, they really want you, they really do
Yeah, they really want you, they really want you, but I do too
I want to be the girl with the most cake 

 When life gives you scrap metal and cattle bones, make lem...er...sculpture like this.